hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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