I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
