I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
