my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
