I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
