I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
