after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
