i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
