i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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