We're facebook friends in real life
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"