Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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