Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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