I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize