Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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