Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize