I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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