i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
