what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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