Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
