forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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