you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
