The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
