so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
