Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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