oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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