I wish I could teleport
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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