That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS