Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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