You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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