its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
