One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize