God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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