some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
