Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize