If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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