but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
