That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize