I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
