Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize