Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize