We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
