You really coming over, don't trick.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
