How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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