I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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