They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
