Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
