What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
