I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
