I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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