Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
false alarm. still invincible.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
All I want is dick and wine.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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